4/8 - They are dirty dirty pirate hookers

[TinkerbellAPixie]

What a strange series of events...

The BQ's yielded Eric & Danielle and it didn't have any effect on the outcome.

And who knew Charla and Myrna would have so many fans in Kula Lampur? It's crazy time!

Danny and Oswald were fighting and all it took was a glass of lemonade to even them back up.

[campfiregirl]

What I hate is they made Mirna almost likeable this evening. Is it a holiday. After the internet slam down they were nice... the world is coming to an end...

Danielle's weave creeps me out. TOUCH UP YOUR ROOTS!! Come on the is television. Plus put on some clothes. I don't need to see you in workout gear... a t-shirt and cargos is prefererd.

Thank Rob U&J went home

[Chris]

Hmmm.

So Oooch-ENNA (As he called himself in Africa when he became tribal and connected to the motherland) and Ta-Ta's go home. I think this is a good thing. They were really boring.

We find out Danny is really not a lot of fun to travel with and that we should really just clone Oswald and have them race together. And then come into my bedroom together.

The Beauty Queens kinda make me hate them for beating out my girls.

Eric and Danielle triumph under the pressure of the Yield as did the last people the Beauty Queens tried to dick over. Will they pull a 'Bama and knock them out of the race next week?

And MY GIRLS. Charla and Mirna. Not only do they grab the best flights, but they fight hard the entire episode, give love to the locals, and make me fall in love with them even harder.

Happy Easter, indeed.

[bevo]

Eric and Dani killed me with their dirty whore speech at the Yield. Obviously the Yield didn't help the BQs win or lose, but using the Yield does not make them bad people, and being Yielded does not make Eric and Dani better people. It's a freakin' game. Shut up Eric and Dani!

RedShirtPhil was really hot, like a belated Valentine's gift

[TinkerbellAPixie]

RedShirtPhil was really hot, like a belated Valentine's gift

OOOH I agree - especially when he was by the Batiq (sp?) challenge with the red silk banner behind him framing him perfectly. He looked positively delicious. :infatuated2:

Did anyone else feel uncomfortable seeing Danielle with her heaving bosom talking to all those covered women? I feel like she should take a cue from the country she is in and put on a top that covers her cleavage out of respect.

[LonnaSaur]

Hmmm.

We find out Danny is really not a lot of fun to travel with and that we should really just clone Oswald and have them race together. And then come into my bedroom together.

No fair, Chris. I wanted the cloned Oswalds!

I don't know why the BQ's chose to yield anyone. It seemed silly to make enemies when you don't have to. That said, Eric and Danielle need to realize this is a game and everyone is trying to win. It's not like the BQ's made up the concept of yield--it's a legitimate and completely "legal" part of the game. Duh.

Um, pirate hookers? Did I miss something, because I have never heard this term before. Maybe it's something Eric picked up while he was(n't) in "colege?" Are they hookers whose only clientele are pirates, or are they pirates who also do some hooking to earn extra booty on the side? Confusing!

[Pegster]

The psychos in an interview saying how they would never try and look over other people's shoulders to get ahead. Please. Sir Dwarfalot sneaks under counters at the drop of a hat every chance she gets.

I would totally use the Yield any chance I could. What if the BQ's had gotten behind & needed that extra 1/2 to pull ahead and not be last on the mat? It's there - I say use it.

Not sad to see Joychenna gone. I liked them well enough, but they've already gotten their mil. I'd rather see someone elst get it this time around.

Hoping for a Cha-cha/BQ one - two in the finals.

[Pekmboyd]

The psychos in an interview saying how they would never try and look over other people's shoulders to get ahead. Please. Sir Dwarfalot sneaks under counters at the drop of a hat every chance she gets.


But that's not OVER other people's shoulders - and in Russian/Spanglish, that's TOTALLY not the same! :glare:

[t-bag]

I hate to say it, but Charla and Mirna are much, much better competitors than I ever imagined going into this race. No way they're being eliminated next episode. It's for sure Eric and Danielle. They just can't compete with the other three teams.

That being said, C & M are CRAZY. What was with her whole inspirational speech to the locals? "Win lots of medals at school!" What? I loved watching that little gnome channel her inner Keebler elf and shovel hundreds of cookies into her mouth.

I wish they would have explained who was right in the Danny/Ozzie argument. Was it just one single cookie in a box full of normal cookies, or was it one entire box out of all the 600 boxes that would be licorice? I thought Ozzie was right, but the more I think about it, Danny had to have been. Otherwise, that challenge would have been impossible. There's no way Danielle could have found it that fast unless it was an entire box. I love how easily Danny and Oswald got over their fight. If it truly is a final three with Danny and Ozzie, Charla and Mirna, and the BQs, I'm going to be completely torn between the blondes and the guys. Both definitely deserve to win.

[Tabby Lavalamp]

If it truly is a final three with Danny and Ozzie, Charla and Mirna, and the BQs, I'm going to be completely torn between the blondes and the guys. Both definitely deserve to win.
I still want the BQs to win, because an all female team winning would be great (and they're still my favourites, of course), and while it was before I started watching, a gay team has already won. That said, I wouldn't be crushed if the ChaChas win.

Now to say something that I'm going to hate myself for in the morning... If Charla and Mirna somehow manage to win, I will let out several explicatives and their sense of entitlement will choke the life out of half the continent, but after the anger subsides, I will admit they deserve the win (but no more so than if any of the other teams win, despite their self-righteousness) and give them props for defying all expectations. Hell, I give them props now for defying all expectations by getting two first place finishes and lasting longer than anyone reasonably expected. They've outlasted some excellent teams.

[Pekmboyd]

The only perfect ending will be if Charla & Mirna are in the lead, but their cab driver recognizes them from their last season and drops them off in the middle of nowhere on the way to the Pit Stop because of how awful they are.

[t-bag]

Apparently there are still five episodes left, with only four teams. I think things are going to get really brutal for the racers pretty soon. The final episode is usually the last three teams, right? So in the next four episodes, only one team is going to be eliminated? I can't imagine they'll end the next three episodes with "this leg isn't over yet" pit stops. If they do, I'm all for that, even though it makes for a shitty end to an episode for the viewers. Make these damn "all stars" earn their win.

[Schoonie]

The finale is on May 6, so four episodes left and only one elimination. There's definitely going to be a double leg coming up, but after that, who knows?

[lennonwhore]

i thought this was an awesome episode and even though i hate eric with all my being - the phrase dirty,dirty pirate hookers was brilliant!

if only he had finished it with: "why don.t they go back to their home on whore island?" would my hatred of him be completely reversed.

[tvaholic]

What exactly is Shmirnese? Russian, Italian, Spanish? I really hope an interviewer will call them on it after the show.

I also hate it when racers take parts of the game too personally, like the yield. So let's see, does that mean I shouldn't block your 2 x's with my o in tic-tac-toe, or not charge people when they land on my boardwalk?? I have a whole new respect for the BQ's this season, they & the Cha Cha's both deserve to win. Actually, I think they should just give the Cha Cha's their own show!

[chooch850]

Did anyone actually miss U&J this episode. I forgot they were even in the race until the end of the show.

Go ChaCha's....

[Schoonie]

the phrase dirty,dirty pirate hookers was brilliant!

Eric misquoted, because I'm pretty sure it's "slutty pirate hooker". It is Eric, so I'm not suprised; also I am ashamed that I know that.

What exactly is Shmirnese? Russian, Italian, Spanish? I really hope an interviewer will call them on it after the show.

I actually read somewhere that they're speakinging like their Armenian grandparents speak, or something. It's an Armenian take on American, or something. And I am officially wasting time trying to explain Mirna's actions. Wow.

[t-bag]

The finale is on May 6, so four episodes left and only one elimination. There's definitely going to be a double leg coming up, but after that, who knows?

Weird. The CBS website has it listed that this was episode 8 and there are 13 total episodes. So if there's four, I guess that explains it. One is non-elimination, two are a double leg, and then the finale. Huh. So I guess other than the competitors, this season really wasn't that much harder. I'm fairly disappointed.

[giffordsaz]

I have decided I would like an Amazing Race that took every first team kicked off the show..... now that would be a season of wows. They must be close to that now... 11 seasons right?

[Pekmboyd]

Eric misquoted, because I'm pretty sure it's "slutty pirate hooker". It is Eric, so I'm not suprised; also I am ashamed that I know that.



I actually read somewhere that they're speakinging like their Armenian grandparents speak, or something. It's an Armenian take on American, or something. And I am officially wasting time trying to explain Mirna's actions. Wow.

I believe he said "slutty pirate hookers" and then looked toward the camera and toward Danielle, and when nobody reacted, he repeated "dirty, dirty pirate hookers" - one of those "oh wait, did you catch that? I was saying something funny - let me say it again just to make sure you have the footgage" moments. I hate those.


Sidenote: Isn't Cher Armenian? She doesn't speak like that. I call Schmirnanigans!

[tvaholic]

I actually read somewhere that they're speakinging like their Armenian grandparents speak, or something. It's an Armenian take on American, or something. And I am officially wasting time trying to explain Mirna's actions. Wow.

Ah, so basically they feel if someone can't speak English they'll understand them if they speak in a loud, slow, Armenian accent. Oy.

[LonnaSaur]

Ah, so basically they feel if someone can't speak English they'll understand them if they speak in a loud, slow, Armenian accent. Oy.

I can't imagine what they're thinking. They sound like morons.

[Devoted Satellite]

I am very fearful of the final episode of this series. I want to see a better ending to the show other than....

.... my cab driver knows the city better than yours
..... my travel agent got me a better flight than yours

I think this race should come down to some level of skill other than people getting screwed over by travel logistics. I liked the AR season where they had the flag challenge at the end, where the contestants had to use their brain & it didnt come down to a taxi race. For those of us who are dedicated fans of the show.... I hope the producers came up with SOME creativity of how to end the last 4/5 episodes of the AllStars edition.

Oh, and if Charla/Mirna win I will be SO sick.
I want either Danny/Osw or BQ's to win.

[LonnaSaur]

I so agree, Satellite! It is much more exciting when it doesn't come down to airplanes or taxies in the end. Even the ending of the heinous family edition was cool when the two guys were putting together that puzzle. It was actually very suspenseful because either one could have won. I remember reading an article before TARAS started where the producers promised this season would be harder--more difficult challenges, countries where people don't WANT to speak English, etc. I have seen very little of that and the challenges are no harder than they have ever been. I am enjoying the season but I certainly can't say it's the best yet, either.

[Awesomeness]

Ah, you are all posters after my own heart.

I completely agree that this season has not been hard enough. None of the challenges have been very difficult, and there haven't been any real communication problems. The only real issues that any team has had has been getting on flights... and we all know what exciting TV it makes to watch someone sit in a travel agency for seven hours! Not even Cha Cha Cha can make that entertaining.

Also, wasn't it Eric & Jeremy who did the flag competition? I think that was their season...

I am also very confused about the rules of the cookie eating. When the clue was read to us, it said that they must search 600 boxes to find "the one" that had the licorce cookies. And that "one" is ambiguous - could be "find the one cookie" or "find the one box". But then when Oz reads the clue to Danny, he emphasized "a cookie".... SO confusing!

I should stop before I make my entire recap redundant, by posting everything I want to say in this little box, but this episode made me hate Mirna and Shmirna more than ever!!! Believe that!

[jampony]

I am very fearful of the final episode of this series. I want to see a better ending to the show other than....

.... my cab driver knows the city better than yours
..... my travel agent got me a better flight than yours

I think this race should come down to some level of skill other than people getting screwed over by travel logistics. I liked the AR season where they had the flag challenge at the end, where the contestants had to use their brain & it didnt come down to a taxi race. For those of us who are dedicated fans of the show.... I hope the producers came up with SOME creativity of how to end the last 4/5 episodes of the AllStars edition.

Oh, and if Charla/Mirna win I will be SO sick.
I want either Danny/Osw or BQ's to win.
Which is why I LOVED Treasure Hunters so much!!! :crying:

I should stop before I make my entire recap redundant, by posting everything I want to say in this little box, but this episode made me hate Mirna and Shmirna more than ever!!! Believe that!
Who cares!?! We love when you writer types post in the forums. You should do it more often!

[Awesomeness]

I'm not sure you really want to get me started! This episode got me so worked up that I yelled at my TV. It was a lot of "That is not playing dirty!" "Where are Joyce & Uchenna?" "That directly contradicts what you said before!" "No, really, where are Joyce & Uchenna?" "That is NOT playing dirty!" "AH! I hate you!"

Did anyone else see the clip with Mirna talking about how much the TAR recapper at TV w/o Pity hates her?

My new dream in life is that Mirna will find this site and learn that TV w/o Pity is not alone.

[TinkerbellAPixie]

My new dream in life is that Mirna will find this site and learn that TV w/o Pity is not alone.

Like jampony - I love that you are posting in the forums!

Maybe you need to use Mirna's name more - that way it'll come up in a Google Search. She is too dense to know to Google Team Crazypants. lol :tongue:

[Pegster]

Awesomeness -

I was not yelling "Where are Joyce & Uchenna." Embarassingly enough, I completely forgot about them. I was seriously starting to get upset b/c I thought the Cha Chas were going to be eliminated!!!

[JulieM]

I hate the easy challenges. I want them eliminated because they sucked at a challenge, not because they couldn't get tickets or a lame taxi driver who can't find his own butt with directions. Searching through mailbags...bah bah boring.

I did like the Batik one and the counting of the stairs. I don't like the merge or whatever you call it.

[Awesomeness]

So I just did a little Google research, and when you google "Mirna The Amazing Race", TV w/o Pity comes up first. TVGasm doesn't come up in the first 10 pages at all (and after that I got bored with looking). BOO to that!! Doesn't Google know that TVGasm is way, way, way more awesome?

Poor Joyce & Uchenna. I actually read that they actually did the Roadblock and Detour, even though the show made it look like they just went straight to the Pit Stop. They said that they were really still trying and hoping that someone else got delayed, too. That made me sad for them - that they had to do all of that for nothing.

[TinkerbellAPixie]

Aww I'm sorry the Google thing didn't work out. I promise to post "Amazing Race" a few dozen times in the comments of your recaps, hopefully that will fix things.

I did feel bad for Joychenna - one bad flight and pfffttt all your dreams are dashed.

[jampony]

So I just did a little Google research, and when you google "Mirna The Amazing Race", TV w/o Pity comes up first. TVGasm doesn't come up in the first 10 pages at all (and after that I got bored with looking). BOO to that!! Doesn't Google know that TVGasm is way, way, way more awesome?
You can take a page from tonyagasm's book (http://forums.tvgasm.com/showthread.php?t=1323&highlight=google)and mention Mirna 500 times in one post so google will find it first. I think it worked, too!

[Chris]

Mirna, baby, if you find us, I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!

I HAVE NOTHING BUT LOVE FOR CHARLA AND MIRNA!

You girls rock!

[Pekmboyd]

Mirna, baby, if you find us, I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!

I HAVE NOTHING BUT LOVE FOR CHARLA AND MIRNA!

You girls rock!

Mirna, if you find us, know that Chris is VASTLY outnumbered!!!!

[TinkerbellAPixie]

Mirna,

Amazing Race's Mirna, from Amazing Race with her cousin Charla of Amazing Race fame. I want you, Mirna, and your cousin Charla, to know that I have watched you both (Charla and Mirna) on Amazing Race All Stars, both during YOUR first season on Amazing Race and again now on Amazing Race All Stars featuring you Mirna and your cousin Charla.

If for some reason you both (Charla and Mirna) do not win Amazing Race All Stars, I just want you both (Charla and Mirna) to know that I have enjoyed watching you on Amazing Race All Stars. Sadly, while watching you both (Charla and Mirna) on Amazing Race All Stars - I have not really wanted either of you (Charla and Mirna) to win Amazing Race All Stars.

Good luck in the race (The Amazing Race) to both you Mirna and your cousin Charla. I hope you lose spectacularly.

Signed,

Amazing Race All Star Fan
Tink

(not a fan of Charla and Mirna)

Do you think that will make it on Google?

[Pekmboyd]

Mirna,

Amazing Race's Mirna, from Amazing Race with her cousin Charla of Amazing Race fame. I want you, Mirna, and your cousin Charla, to know that I have watched you both (Charla and Mirna) on Amazing Race All Stars, both during YOUR first season on Amazing Race and again now on Amazing Race All Stars featuring you Mirna and your cousin Charla.

If for some reason you both (Charla and Mirna) do not win Amazing Race All Stars, I just want you both (Charla and Mirna) to know that I have enjoyed watching you on Amazing Race All Stars. Sadly, while watching you both (Charla and Mirna) on Amazing Race All Stars - I have not really wanted either of you (Charla and Mirna) to win Amazing Race All Stars.

Good luck in the race (The Amazing Race) to both you Mirna and your cousin Charla. I hope you lose spectacularly.

Signed,

Amazing Race All Star Fan
Tink

(not a fan of Charla and Mirna)

Do you think that will make it on Google?

PS. Charla Mirna Charla Mirna Charla Mirna

[jampony]

Ah, tink... mattygasmdakotatonya would be proud!

[TinkerbellAPixie]

PS. Charla Mirna Charla Mirna Charla Mirna

You forgot to mention who they are - Charla and Mirna of Amazing Race All Stars on CBS. :tonguewag:

[chooch850]

Mirna,

Amazing Race's Mirna, from Amazing Race with her cousin Charla of Amazing Race fame. I want you, Mirna, and your cousin Charla, to know that I have watched you both (Charla and Mirna) on Amazing Race All Stars, both during YOUR first season on Amazing Race and again now on Amazing Race All Stars featuring you Mirna and your cousin Charla.

If for some reason you both (Charla and Mirna) do not win Amazing Race All Stars, I just want you both (Charla and Mirna) to know that I have enjoyed watching you on Amazing Race All Stars. Sadly, while watching you both (Charla and Mirna) on Amazing Race All Stars - I have not really wanted either of you (Charla and Mirna) to win Amazing Race All Stars.

Good luck in the race (The Amazing Race) to both you Mirna and your cousin Charla. I hope you lose spectacularly.

Signed,

Amazing Race All Star Fan
Tink

(not a fan of Charla and Mirna)

Do you think that will make it on Google?

Does this help our Charla and Mirna campaign?

[Pegster]

PS. Charla Mirna Charla Mirna Charla Mirna

Yo. I believe you meant to say: Charla Mirna Charla Mirna SUCK!!!! That one word makes all the difference. :D

Sorry, Chris. :sneaky:

[secretbroccoli]

it almost makes you feel bad for Charla and Mirna, seeing how much people dislike them...but then i think, theyre getting to travel around the world on tv while i'm just stuck watching them travel around the world on tv, so shouldnt i feel worse for myself?? (hmm i dont think the word worse sounds right in that sentence, but you guys get the picture)

oh and by the way, its actually "Smelly Pirate Hooker" its a quote from Anchorman and Eric is totally just jealous bc the BQs are better in the race and hotter than he'll ever have a chance with, and also the flag competition was last season, the one the Hippies one, and by far one of my favorite competitions in AR history...(i like flags, yeah, i know its wierd)

[Tabby Lavalamp]

also the flag competition was last season, the one the Hippies one
(Pssst! You mean the season before last, Tyler and James (the ex-junkies) won last season. :))

[Awesomeness]

Ha! You guys are cracking me up!

Mirna is sure to find us now!

Maybe we can get her to come in and do a ClipGasm interview like Dr. Will & Boogie did after Big Brother?!

[TinkerbellAPixie]

Maybe we can get her to come in and do a ClipGasm interview like Dr. Will & Boogie did after Big Brother?!

Now THAT would be worth the price of admission!

[TinkerbellAPixie]

Oh I just did a test - when you Google "Charla Amazing Race" TVGasm is the 8th site down on page one. When you Google "Mirna Amazing Race", "Charla and Mirna" or "Charla and Mirna Amazing Race" TVGasm is not on page 1 at all.

I'll keep doing my part to get TVGasm up on page 1 of Google.

Maybe if I put this in my signature line - then it will appear in all 3,000+ of my posts:

"I loathe Charla and Mirna from The Amazing Race"

[Schoonie]

What if Charla and Mirna do find this site? That sort of terrifies me to even think about. What if they post? My computer might explode.

[TinkerbellAPixie]

Better yet - what if LISI found this site? lol

[tvaholic]

Remember-Mirna said she's a lawyer!!:D

On that note...Mirna Amazing Race Mirna Amazing Race All-star

[chooch850]

I see another apology on the horizon.......

[TinkerbellAPixie]

From Mirna?

[Pegster]

Maybe we can get her to come in and do a ClipGasm interview like Dr. Will & Boogie did after Big Brother?!

That would be too expensive. The 'gasm would have to hire an English to ArmenianIdiot interpreter.

[Awesomeness]

You're assuming I don't speak idiot....

[TinkerbellAPixie]

You're assuming I don't speak idiot....

Actually - you probably have to be fluent in it to recap TAR. Plus it would help reading some of those mean comments you get.

Isn't it nicer in here - no one picks on you.

[Awesomeness]

It is WAY nicer!!

I know everyone loved B-Side (me too!), but was surprised at how angry & mean people were. But that seems to have died off (yay!) - maybe the mean people went away and now we can all be brothers in our mutual love with TAR!

[Tabby Lavalamp]

It is WAY nicer!!
You bet your ass it is, bitch.

[jampony]

You bet your ass it is, bitch.

Tabby! Seriously, what's wrong with you? It's "you bet your sweet ass it is, bitch!"

[Pegster]

You're assuming I don't speak idiot....

I have no doubt you can hold your own in an idiot conversation.

Armenian Idiot, however, is a unique and special dialect spoken by psychos and dwarves in small sects around the world. It is rarely understood by those outside of their social class.


Isn't it nicer in here - no one picks on you.

Give us time, Tink. Give us time.

[t-bag]

My mom spends so much time making fun of Mirna's Spanglish-with-a-Russian-twist. And then, lo and behold, she goes and starts unintentionally using Spanglish-with-a-Russian-accent in the Dominican. I fear somewhere down the line Mirna and I are related.

[Schoonie]

Bag, that is hilarious. Did your mom call herself a "young girl" a whole bunch of times and tell you to constantly hurry up, too?

[t-bag]

No, but she told all the little Dominican children to win lots of medals at school.

[Ms. Tumnus]

My mom spends so much time making fun of Mirna's Spanglish-with-a-Russian-twist. And then, lo and behold, she goes and starts unintentionally using Spanglish-with-a-Russian-accent in the Dominican. I fear somewhere down the line Mirna and I are related.

OMR. My mom was doing the same thing in Cuba, and topped it all off with exaggerated hand gestures (e.g. pointing to her glass and raising her eyebrows and nodding a lot when she'd order a drink). The worse part was, most of the staffers at the hotel spoke both English and French fluently (which she does too), but she insisted on doing this strange pantomime. I had to tell her to stop cause I was so embarassed.

[Schoonie]

So does this mean that the whole accent thing is some sort of phenomenon among Americans, or is this the spread of Mirna, as if she were the Bubonic Plague (which she might actually be)?

[Clair]

So does this mean that the whole accent thing is some sort of phenomenon among Americans, or is this the spread of Mirna, as if she were the Bubonic Plague (which she might actually be)?

Well, she DID hint at it in Poland, "It's like we're the plague."

[Schoonie]

I'm going to have to start calling her Typhoid Mirna.