flipit
07-02-2007, 04:43 PM
Well, well, well. Don’t get your tomatoes ready to throw at me yet. Just let the record show that I actually LIVE on South Beach; approximately 2 blocks, 112 feet and 3 bars away from Miami Inks “parlor”. I put “parlor” in quotations because just how the camera puts 10lbs on people, it seems to have added 10 feet of space to the shop. Shall we begin?
Those who are frequent watchers of this show are aware of Kat’s departure and the boys are in need of a new artist. In this episode, we are introduced to Tim Hendrix A.K.A Timmay! I’m a little skeptical of him at first because the shop is already a sausage fest, why add another kielbasa to the party? This is South Beach for god sakes! Can we get some T&A up in there?!?
Our first customer of the day is Brianna. She’s your typical SoBe chick who is set in her confusing ways. In laymen’s terms, she’s a flip-flopper! While claiming she doesn’t believe in wars and the killing of people or animals, she reluctantly reveals that she’s had a passion for guns ever since her granddaddy told her stories of him blowing shit up in wars. Um, okaaay. This is why Brianna has decided to get a tattoo of a gun holstered to her hip with an invisible holster. So there is no holster; just think gun on hip.
We cut to a clip of Ami saying how family is everything to him. If you continue to read, the irony in this clip will be revealed later.
Our next customer is Samantha. She’s possibly a 30 year old, but she looks like she’s 20… Although she actually maybe IS 20 years old but had her 7 year old daughter when she was 13? I’m gonna guess she’s somewhere in between those ages and move on before my brain freezes. Sam wants to get a tat of an owl in memory of her grandmother who loved owls and in my opinion resembled an owl. It’s actually a special story, just like every story we see on this show, but I can relate to the lost of a grandparent.
Heading to the first commercial break, my finger swiftly Tivo’s forward… Don’t worry; I’ll be quicker next time.
Ok, so now we began to find out how awesome Tim is. His first morning in the shop and he has already banged out two tattoos: A girl who wanted a tat of her name with her favorite number, which is the # 13 (Not superstitious much, eh?), and an un-sober looking guy who is getting the numbers 1.8.99 on his back, this is his sobriety anniversary date. Have any of you realized that there is actually a bar right next to the shop? No, seriously; Jazid is a bar, not a dance studio!
Back to a customer worthy of airtime: The Beard. His actual name is Matt, but he has a really long beard, so they call him… The Beard. On his back he is getting a tat of some old dude w/ an even longer beard than his; old dude’s name is Hans Lanseth, for any of you kids that wanted to look him up. He held the record for having the longest beard ever reaching at 17 _ feet. You can make a noose out of that thing! Wonder how he died??? Moving along.
Hope you guys didn’t forget about Samantha, the owl Lady. Ami is working on her now and it’s looking pretty cool. I love how Ami loves every tattoo he does. Although he’s a cocky lil’ sumina-somethin’, you can sense that he really loves his job and he’s not all that bad. Kid’s got some talent!
All throughout this episode, there have been little confessional scenes by the artists, but I only write about the ones worth my while because I’m too f-ing lazy and I really don’t care about the others & neither should you! Cutting to Tim’s confessional, he talks about how it took him 15 years to find the right artist to tattoo his deceased father’s face on his chest. I figure it took him that long because he must not be ambidextrous, otherwise he probably would have tatted it himself. Cause Tim Rocks!
Finally we get to see one of Tim’s camera-time deserving clients. It’s a married couple and the husband wants a tattoo of his infant son who passed away from SIDS. He is a youth pastor who is getting ink permanently in his skin. You guys have no idea how bad I want to elaborate on this fact, but lightening just struck outside and I don’t want to burn in hell. The couple gives Tim all of these intricate ideas they have for the tattoo based on photos of their infant son. Tim tells them he can hook it up, but I already know he’s gonna do it his way and it will be cool.
Time for a little fun at the shop as Garver [Chris] asks Tim if he wants him to finish the Cobra Tim has slithering from his chest to his tummy. Tim explains how the tat symbolizes his trip to Indonesia and how he had the pleasure of drinking cobra’s blood. At this moment I wonder if you can get a buzz from drinking that stuff, Tim confirms my suspicions later on in the show.
Next, we get our first shot of Bella, Ami’s American bulldog. He constantly refers to her as piggy and every other fat like slur. And he wonders why he has been married 5 times? Hmmmm…. They are taking a stroll in the dog park; here we get a shot of a pit-bull half Bella’s size humping her chest, and another shot of Bella playing with a cute terrier. Awwwwww….
The Beard is back and ready for action. He tells us that he’s a pro BMX bike rider and I question what is the weight limit to enter these competitions are, because he’s a big fella! Or maybe it’s just his big ass beard throwing me off, I don’t know. He then makes it known that aside from his fascination of long beards, he actually is entering the “Beard Championships” for the freestyle divisions. Okay, are we talking about bikes or beards here? He clarifies this for me by showing the guys in the shop the tricks he can do with his beard by blow drying it into 3 sections that look like triangles. This is only day one of his tattoo venture since the picture of the old beardy dude is covering his entire back and has so much detail, we’ll see The Beard again another day.
There are shots of people on the beach sprinkled throughout this show to segue-way to the next scene. These scenes trip me out because I’ve been hoping to see a shot of myself so I can sue them for not having me sign a waiver to be on the show. One day I will prevail!
The youth pastor and his wife return to finally get the memorial of his son tatted on his arm. Did I mention that the pastor looks like a rock star? Ok, never mind. Tim explains how he went in a different direction from their original idea and the couple loves it. After Tim is done, they show the end result of the tattoo and all I could think is “that’s hot”. Oh, how Paris Hilton-esqe of me…
Then comes in Zack who is one of a trillion male models on South Beach; he wants a tattoo of an angel on his back. He has decided on angels to remind him that god is always with him. I wonder if he thinks the same thing while he’s lying in bed with his boyfriend. *Thunder rolling in* Sorry God, I couldn’t help it…
Lame clip of Ami on a skateboard, but he wipes out while attempting a kick flip. Bro, stick to doing art…
Chris is now finishing Tim’s cobra. They have a cute moment when Chris starts plucking Tim’s rogue hairs out of the cobra. Now it is officially tattoo your friends’ day and Darren wants in. We’ll get to his tat in a minute.
The Beard is back, again, for the final touches to Old Beardy Dude. He chants some weird words in tongue as Chris is inking him. It’s freaky, but me likey.
We’re drawing to the end of the day and Ami has arrived at his house. None other than his bitch Bella is there to give him a sloppy welcome home kiss. This is where Ami professes his love for Bella by saying no one else likes to deal with him except for Bella henceforth she is his family and has unconditional love for her. Buddy there ARE humans that actually walk this earth that can reciprocate those feelings, ya know.
Darren is stoked about having Tim do his tattoo which is in honor of his aunt… Who is not, I repeat, NOT dead. These guys seem to just tattoo themselves for fun, huh? Anyway, he explains that he was really close to her, but now she has Parkinson’s and he hasn’t been able to communicate with her the way he used to. Tim hammers in these sweet ass prayer hands that have a rosary strummed between the fingers on Darren’s neck. The detail is so awesome; it looks like the pearls in the rosary are shining. Darren’s now got some BLING!
Zack is our final customer of the day and is getting his angel permanently bestowed upon his back. He whines about how some days he doesn’t feel beautiful because of the harsh criticism of modeling agencies. I’m almost afraid that this kid may be suicidal. Almost. After the work is done, he thinks out loud whether or not the agencies would accept his permanent angel. Kids, remember, think before you act.
Now it’s time to say good-bye to good ol’ Timmay. T-I-M… man, this guy ROCKS! M-A-Y, why, because he just does… Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blaaaaaah!!!!! Ami and the crew say good-bye to Tim, and Ami confesses that he wishes he could stay. As you can see, the crew is all hanging on Tim’s nuts, pretty much like I have been throughout this entire recap. Tim is a nomad; he travels a lot and stops to do work when his reefer & beer funds run out. He will be missed.
And that’s all folks!
Those who are frequent watchers of this show are aware of Kat’s departure and the boys are in need of a new artist. In this episode, we are introduced to Tim Hendrix A.K.A Timmay! I’m a little skeptical of him at first because the shop is already a sausage fest, why add another kielbasa to the party? This is South Beach for god sakes! Can we get some T&A up in there?!?
Our first customer of the day is Brianna. She’s your typical SoBe chick who is set in her confusing ways. In laymen’s terms, she’s a flip-flopper! While claiming she doesn’t believe in wars and the killing of people or animals, she reluctantly reveals that she’s had a passion for guns ever since her granddaddy told her stories of him blowing shit up in wars. Um, okaaay. This is why Brianna has decided to get a tattoo of a gun holstered to her hip with an invisible holster. So there is no holster; just think gun on hip.
We cut to a clip of Ami saying how family is everything to him. If you continue to read, the irony in this clip will be revealed later.
Our next customer is Samantha. She’s possibly a 30 year old, but she looks like she’s 20… Although she actually maybe IS 20 years old but had her 7 year old daughter when she was 13? I’m gonna guess she’s somewhere in between those ages and move on before my brain freezes. Sam wants to get a tat of an owl in memory of her grandmother who loved owls and in my opinion resembled an owl. It’s actually a special story, just like every story we see on this show, but I can relate to the lost of a grandparent.
Heading to the first commercial break, my finger swiftly Tivo’s forward… Don’t worry; I’ll be quicker next time.
Ok, so now we began to find out how awesome Tim is. His first morning in the shop and he has already banged out two tattoos: A girl who wanted a tat of her name with her favorite number, which is the # 13 (Not superstitious much, eh?), and an un-sober looking guy who is getting the numbers 1.8.99 on his back, this is his sobriety anniversary date. Have any of you realized that there is actually a bar right next to the shop? No, seriously; Jazid is a bar, not a dance studio!
Back to a customer worthy of airtime: The Beard. His actual name is Matt, but he has a really long beard, so they call him… The Beard. On his back he is getting a tat of some old dude w/ an even longer beard than his; old dude’s name is Hans Lanseth, for any of you kids that wanted to look him up. He held the record for having the longest beard ever reaching at 17 _ feet. You can make a noose out of that thing! Wonder how he died??? Moving along.
Hope you guys didn’t forget about Samantha, the owl Lady. Ami is working on her now and it’s looking pretty cool. I love how Ami loves every tattoo he does. Although he’s a cocky lil’ sumina-somethin’, you can sense that he really loves his job and he’s not all that bad. Kid’s got some talent!
All throughout this episode, there have been little confessional scenes by the artists, but I only write about the ones worth my while because I’m too f-ing lazy and I really don’t care about the others & neither should you! Cutting to Tim’s confessional, he talks about how it took him 15 years to find the right artist to tattoo his deceased father’s face on his chest. I figure it took him that long because he must not be ambidextrous, otherwise he probably would have tatted it himself. Cause Tim Rocks!
Finally we get to see one of Tim’s camera-time deserving clients. It’s a married couple and the husband wants a tattoo of his infant son who passed away from SIDS. He is a youth pastor who is getting ink permanently in his skin. You guys have no idea how bad I want to elaborate on this fact, but lightening just struck outside and I don’t want to burn in hell. The couple gives Tim all of these intricate ideas they have for the tattoo based on photos of their infant son. Tim tells them he can hook it up, but I already know he’s gonna do it his way and it will be cool.
Time for a little fun at the shop as Garver [Chris] asks Tim if he wants him to finish the Cobra Tim has slithering from his chest to his tummy. Tim explains how the tat symbolizes his trip to Indonesia and how he had the pleasure of drinking cobra’s blood. At this moment I wonder if you can get a buzz from drinking that stuff, Tim confirms my suspicions later on in the show.
Next, we get our first shot of Bella, Ami’s American bulldog. He constantly refers to her as piggy and every other fat like slur. And he wonders why he has been married 5 times? Hmmmm…. They are taking a stroll in the dog park; here we get a shot of a pit-bull half Bella’s size humping her chest, and another shot of Bella playing with a cute terrier. Awwwwww….
The Beard is back and ready for action. He tells us that he’s a pro BMX bike rider and I question what is the weight limit to enter these competitions are, because he’s a big fella! Or maybe it’s just his big ass beard throwing me off, I don’t know. He then makes it known that aside from his fascination of long beards, he actually is entering the “Beard Championships” for the freestyle divisions. Okay, are we talking about bikes or beards here? He clarifies this for me by showing the guys in the shop the tricks he can do with his beard by blow drying it into 3 sections that look like triangles. This is only day one of his tattoo venture since the picture of the old beardy dude is covering his entire back and has so much detail, we’ll see The Beard again another day.
There are shots of people on the beach sprinkled throughout this show to segue-way to the next scene. These scenes trip me out because I’ve been hoping to see a shot of myself so I can sue them for not having me sign a waiver to be on the show. One day I will prevail!
The youth pastor and his wife return to finally get the memorial of his son tatted on his arm. Did I mention that the pastor looks like a rock star? Ok, never mind. Tim explains how he went in a different direction from their original idea and the couple loves it. After Tim is done, they show the end result of the tattoo and all I could think is “that’s hot”. Oh, how Paris Hilton-esqe of me…
Then comes in Zack who is one of a trillion male models on South Beach; he wants a tattoo of an angel on his back. He has decided on angels to remind him that god is always with him. I wonder if he thinks the same thing while he’s lying in bed with his boyfriend. *Thunder rolling in* Sorry God, I couldn’t help it…
Lame clip of Ami on a skateboard, but he wipes out while attempting a kick flip. Bro, stick to doing art…
Chris is now finishing Tim’s cobra. They have a cute moment when Chris starts plucking Tim’s rogue hairs out of the cobra. Now it is officially tattoo your friends’ day and Darren wants in. We’ll get to his tat in a minute.
The Beard is back, again, for the final touches to Old Beardy Dude. He chants some weird words in tongue as Chris is inking him. It’s freaky, but me likey.
We’re drawing to the end of the day and Ami has arrived at his house. None other than his bitch Bella is there to give him a sloppy welcome home kiss. This is where Ami professes his love for Bella by saying no one else likes to deal with him except for Bella henceforth she is his family and has unconditional love for her. Buddy there ARE humans that actually walk this earth that can reciprocate those feelings, ya know.
Darren is stoked about having Tim do his tattoo which is in honor of his aunt… Who is not, I repeat, NOT dead. These guys seem to just tattoo themselves for fun, huh? Anyway, he explains that he was really close to her, but now she has Parkinson’s and he hasn’t been able to communicate with her the way he used to. Tim hammers in these sweet ass prayer hands that have a rosary strummed between the fingers on Darren’s neck. The detail is so awesome; it looks like the pearls in the rosary are shining. Darren’s now got some BLING!
Zack is our final customer of the day and is getting his angel permanently bestowed upon his back. He whines about how some days he doesn’t feel beautiful because of the harsh criticism of modeling agencies. I’m almost afraid that this kid may be suicidal. Almost. After the work is done, he thinks out loud whether or not the agencies would accept his permanent angel. Kids, remember, think before you act.
Now it’s time to say good-bye to good ol’ Timmay. T-I-M… man, this guy ROCKS! M-A-Y, why, because he just does… Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blaaaaaah!!!!! Ami and the crew say good-bye to Tim, and Ami confesses that he wishes he could stay. As you can see, the crew is all hanging on Tim’s nuts, pretty much like I have been throughout this entire recap. Tim is a nomad; he travels a lot and stops to do work when his reefer & beer funds run out. He will be missed.
And that’s all folks!