flipit
07-02-2007, 04:59 PM
I had the weather channel on before I started watching “Supernatural.” (Thunderstorm warnings in effect for the entire tri-state area.) Shit, did I leave my sunroof open?
I should tell you, I’ve never seen “Supernatural” before. I’ve never even heard of “Supernatural.” I should probably add that I’m not into sci-fi. I just don’t dig demons. With the exception of “The Sixth Sense” I can do without ghost stories, and my only connection with horrifying or disturbing visions was last Tuesday when I had a dream that I got back together with my college boyfriend. So you’ll forgive me when I tell you that before show started, I looked out the window and thought to myself, “maybe they’ll be a blackout.” Then I asked my roommate if she knew how to do a rain dance.
Ten minutes into the show I realized that Sam and Dean Winchester are the main characters. (Sam and Dean? Um…Rat Pack much?) Sam and Dean are two very attractive but very poorly dressed brothers who apparently travel the country in a Pontiac Bonneville ridding the world of various “supernatural” beings; all in the hopes of honoring their dead parents who were killed by demons. Interesting premise. Now I know why I wasn’t sure what channel the CW is. Wait, was that thunder?
The only thing that made this show remotely watchable for me is the sheer level of hotness attained by Dean. Not to suggest that Sam is tough on the eyes, but Sam’s more the longhaired, maybe I shower, maybe I just rinse occasionally with lake water, type of guy. And I have a strict rule against dirty balls, I’m sorry. Dean’s more pretty boy and clean cut. Plus he’s emotionally troubled and appears to have a slight drinking problem…two of my weaknesses when it comes to attraction to men; most likely attributable to a ten-year crush on Dylan McKay. Oh yeah, and Dean’s voice is eerily identical to Brad Pitt. Identical. If you close your eyes and listen carefully when he speaks, you can almost hear the sounds of poor foreign children being spoiled in the background.
This episode starts when Sam has a premonition that Dean shoots an innocent man in Riverside, Oregon. Sam’s premonitions usually come true, so what do Sam and Dean do to make sure such an event doesn’t occur? They grab their 9 millimeters and travel to Riverside, Oregon-the land of the innocent. Get serious gentlemen. You want to avoid killing some innocent guy, and have fun while you’re at it? Here’s a tip: Lose the glocks, get a haircut, grab a bathing suit and head out to Montauk on a lady hunt working the “we just lost our parents” angle. Just a suggestion.
When they arrive in Riverside, Sam and Dean find that the entire town has been stricken by a plague that leaves its victims possessed, and the plague is being transferred by blood-to-blood contact. And I thought Hep C was a bitch. Cut scene to a fine young lad helping his father tie up his mother, slicing her with a knife, slicing himself with a knife, and then purposely bleeding into her wound. The kid made the Menedez brothers look like mama’s boys. Good lord, what’s a girl gotta do to get a little blackout around here!?
Dean and Sam try to notify the authorities about the plague but all cell phone service is dead, as is every single payphone in town. Sam asks, “Do you think the demons cut off all phone capabilities?” Dean replies, “If I wanted to massacre an entire town, that’d be my first step.” That’s funny, because if I wanted to massacre my Auditiongasm opponents, my first step would be forcing them to recap “Supernatural.”
Sam and Dean rescue the mom and bring her to a doctor, only to discover that the mom already caught Hep C. Then mom tries to attack them with a fire extinguisher in a possessed rage. And we wonder why reality TV is so popular. Dean has no choice but to kill the mom, but not before mom manages to infect Pam the nurse. Incidentally, Nurse Pam is wearing a red headband that wouldn’t be socially acceptable even if it were still 1986 and she paired them with matching Jellies. Nurse Pam tries to infect Sam, at which point we make the shocking discovery that Sam is immune to Hep C. Probably some sort of chemical interaction with lake water, I’d suspect.
Sam, Dean, the doctor, and some uninfected townie decide they need to get out of town. Unfortunately, the only way out of town is blocked by possessed townsfolk, so explosives become required. Dean and Sam start to MacGyver some explosives using tissues, rubbing alcohol, a live chicken, and some other hospital chemicals, but they realize they are short a few ingredients, and Dean announces, “We need more alcohol!” Don’t we all Dean, don’t we all…
The episode ends unexpectedly when all the possessed townies mysteriously vanish, and all the contaminated blood inexplicably goes back to normal. Sam and Dean are puzzled by the odd turn of events, but they head back to Connecticut anyway because Sam has a Lake Water Bathers Club of America meeting to get to and Dean needs to pick up a dozen roses and a six pack and head over to my apartment.
If you ask me there is nothing “super” about this show, and it’s about as “natural” as a Brazilian bikini wax. The show should be renamed either, “One and a Half Hot Guys in a Bonneville,” or “The Show that Never Ends.” Three minutes and forty-five seconds after the show ended I finally got my blackout. If that’s not supernatural, I don’t know what is.
I should tell you, I’ve never seen “Supernatural” before. I’ve never even heard of “Supernatural.” I should probably add that I’m not into sci-fi. I just don’t dig demons. With the exception of “The Sixth Sense” I can do without ghost stories, and my only connection with horrifying or disturbing visions was last Tuesday when I had a dream that I got back together with my college boyfriend. So you’ll forgive me when I tell you that before show started, I looked out the window and thought to myself, “maybe they’ll be a blackout.” Then I asked my roommate if she knew how to do a rain dance.
Ten minutes into the show I realized that Sam and Dean Winchester are the main characters. (Sam and Dean? Um…Rat Pack much?) Sam and Dean are two very attractive but very poorly dressed brothers who apparently travel the country in a Pontiac Bonneville ridding the world of various “supernatural” beings; all in the hopes of honoring their dead parents who were killed by demons. Interesting premise. Now I know why I wasn’t sure what channel the CW is. Wait, was that thunder?
The only thing that made this show remotely watchable for me is the sheer level of hotness attained by Dean. Not to suggest that Sam is tough on the eyes, but Sam’s more the longhaired, maybe I shower, maybe I just rinse occasionally with lake water, type of guy. And I have a strict rule against dirty balls, I’m sorry. Dean’s more pretty boy and clean cut. Plus he’s emotionally troubled and appears to have a slight drinking problem…two of my weaknesses when it comes to attraction to men; most likely attributable to a ten-year crush on Dylan McKay. Oh yeah, and Dean’s voice is eerily identical to Brad Pitt. Identical. If you close your eyes and listen carefully when he speaks, you can almost hear the sounds of poor foreign children being spoiled in the background.
This episode starts when Sam has a premonition that Dean shoots an innocent man in Riverside, Oregon. Sam’s premonitions usually come true, so what do Sam and Dean do to make sure such an event doesn’t occur? They grab their 9 millimeters and travel to Riverside, Oregon-the land of the innocent. Get serious gentlemen. You want to avoid killing some innocent guy, and have fun while you’re at it? Here’s a tip: Lose the glocks, get a haircut, grab a bathing suit and head out to Montauk on a lady hunt working the “we just lost our parents” angle. Just a suggestion.
When they arrive in Riverside, Sam and Dean find that the entire town has been stricken by a plague that leaves its victims possessed, and the plague is being transferred by blood-to-blood contact. And I thought Hep C was a bitch. Cut scene to a fine young lad helping his father tie up his mother, slicing her with a knife, slicing himself with a knife, and then purposely bleeding into her wound. The kid made the Menedez brothers look like mama’s boys. Good lord, what’s a girl gotta do to get a little blackout around here!?
Dean and Sam try to notify the authorities about the plague but all cell phone service is dead, as is every single payphone in town. Sam asks, “Do you think the demons cut off all phone capabilities?” Dean replies, “If I wanted to massacre an entire town, that’d be my first step.” That’s funny, because if I wanted to massacre my Auditiongasm opponents, my first step would be forcing them to recap “Supernatural.”
Sam and Dean rescue the mom and bring her to a doctor, only to discover that the mom already caught Hep C. Then mom tries to attack them with a fire extinguisher in a possessed rage. And we wonder why reality TV is so popular. Dean has no choice but to kill the mom, but not before mom manages to infect Pam the nurse. Incidentally, Nurse Pam is wearing a red headband that wouldn’t be socially acceptable even if it were still 1986 and she paired them with matching Jellies. Nurse Pam tries to infect Sam, at which point we make the shocking discovery that Sam is immune to Hep C. Probably some sort of chemical interaction with lake water, I’d suspect.
Sam, Dean, the doctor, and some uninfected townie decide they need to get out of town. Unfortunately, the only way out of town is blocked by possessed townsfolk, so explosives become required. Dean and Sam start to MacGyver some explosives using tissues, rubbing alcohol, a live chicken, and some other hospital chemicals, but they realize they are short a few ingredients, and Dean announces, “We need more alcohol!” Don’t we all Dean, don’t we all…
The episode ends unexpectedly when all the possessed townies mysteriously vanish, and all the contaminated blood inexplicably goes back to normal. Sam and Dean are puzzled by the odd turn of events, but they head back to Connecticut anyway because Sam has a Lake Water Bathers Club of America meeting to get to and Dean needs to pick up a dozen roses and a six pack and head over to my apartment.
If you ask me there is nothing “super” about this show, and it’s about as “natural” as a Brazilian bikini wax. The show should be renamed either, “One and a Half Hot Guys in a Bonneville,” or “The Show that Never Ends.” Three minutes and forty-five seconds after the show ended I finally got my blackout. If that’s not supernatural, I don’t know what is.