flipit
08-12-2008, 09:31 PM
****Thanks for checking out this Fall's Auditiongasm! Please vote and leave your critiques. WE LISTEN! Remember that you are not voting for what show you want to see recapped, but for the best writing! If you want to audition, send me an email at Flipit75@gmail.com. Thanks guys, and good luck recappers!
So, I must first admit that when I got this assignment, I downloaded the entire season to check out what I was getting into. It was only 4 eps, so no biggie. I mention this just because I at times may get a little more into the contestants and show than any rational 30-something-sans-kids should. Let's do this!
Nick Lachey tells us that what happened previously, which I totally already know about. But this isn't about me. Kids were auditioned from around the country by 6 talent scouts (the “faculty”) to find that one kid that is the “total package.” This will be mentioned a lot -- the total package. In case you don't know what that means, the person they choose must have the right combination of “personality, team spirit and talent”. In the coming weeks they will be singing, dancing and acting -- the whole ball of wax. Why are we doing all this, you ask? Well, the grand prize winner gets a talent holding deal, a single released on Disney records, and a starring role in a video to be played at the end of High School Musical 3. So, I had no idea what a talent holding deal was, and I hadda look it up. Basically, they are signed to star in a future show or develop a show at some point in the future. I'm not sure if that's good news or news that means the winner will fade away while Disney waits out this contract. Nick also tells us that there will be “evaluations” and those that don't cut it go to the “chorus.” Aw. I like how they say evaluation, instead of elimination. But now does that mean they still hang around? For what? And where are these kids staying? Are their parents around? More importantly, who's keeping their eye on Isaiah? I just don't know right now.
Anyway, the kids are totally psyched! Before we start smashing dreams, though, Nick insists that we find out why these kids have made the cut. TJ says he hopes the other students' see him as dependable. Aw.
Nick calls in the “faculty”, the 6 experts who are going to be their teachers during the competition, and natch, I haven't heard of them. But I don't run in sing/dance circles, so this is no surprise. Rob Adler, an acting coach, joins the kids on stage and asks them to come up one at a time. The other kids there are then asked to give their first impressions of each kid. Get it? Okay.
James: 16 (Writes in his journal every day) James looks, well, nerdy today, mostly due to his glasses and always-flushed face. James was culled from an audition tape sent into the producers by his father. James is in a band. James would have been my secret crush in HS, actually. I think he'll be adorable when he's older, and he actually has a great voice. First impressions: Briana says “Ummm...” and giggles. Ookay. Though I guess it's probably nerve wracking to be the first. James also gets stylish, smart, chill, intelligent, pretty eyes, calm, collected. I think most of this is code speak for “nerd.” Aw. To be fair, in the shots of James singing with his band, he looks good. But then he must get nervous, because his face is forever flush red, and he's wearing glasses. He's surprised by the calm and collected comment, as he doesn't think he really is. He tries to “put on a front.” James promises us that he will knock our socks off.
Rob babbles on something about not being now who you were a minute ago, and it's “feedback” and information. I don't know either. I think he's just trying to break the ice. I guess it works, because James agrees with him.
Briana: 16 (Homeshooled all her life) She reminds me of Mandy Moore a bit. First impressions: Shy, sporty, rocker, intimidating, gives a power punch. I swear someone also said “player” but I must have misheard. She does seem well adjusted for being home schooled.
Stan: 17 (Former HS footballer) Impressions: popular, jock, always has a girl, ladies' man. Anthony says he would have given him his lunch money to avoid getting beaten up. Shayna says she feels like he wants a secret girlfriend that no one knows about. Stan blushes.
Christie: 18 (Has 210 friends in her phone) No, really. That's what the little blurb says. This is actually not terribly surprising, once you watch her for 5 seconds. She is not shy. I've never even met 210 people in my whole life, I don't think. Anyway, impressions: Colorful, sweet girl, bubbly -- dumb blond (from Isaiah). Record scratch as we see Christie not just frown, but look totally pissed and hurt. Rob asks if that surprises her, and she says no, but what did surprise her was that he said it -- had the balls to say it, I gather. She laughs it off though -- girlfriend has way more control than me.
Isaiah voice overs that he thinks the others were just too nervous to be truthful to someone who would then judge you.
Isaiah: 17 (Nominated for Prom King) He's the one that said Christie seemed like a dumb blond. He's also a self-claimed ladies' man, though in previous shows (did I mention I watched them all?) some of the girls say it about him as well. Though whether his actions or just him talking about it all the time prompted them to say that, we'll never know. Impressions: player, ego, flirt, sporto. Isaiah diaries that he has lots of friends, that just happen to be girls. I've heard that one before. Christie says that he seems an over achiever in sports since he's so short. Zing!
Ether: 18 (Plays 12 instruments) He carries a heavy nerd vibe, this one. And while he can sing, he has a hard time shrugging this image. Impressions: painfully shy, nerd, quiet, nerd, timid, bookworm, nerd, nerd, nerd. Well, not actually, but you get the idea. He swears he doesn't know why people think he's a nerd. Then he warns someone off camera to give him back his pen. But really, if it looks like a duck, and walks like a duck... Embrace the nerd, Ether. Then knock 'em dead with your singing.
Christina: 18 (Tomboy in high school) Impressions: exotic beauty, very attractive, someone “I want to get to know” -- that from Isaiah. I've got my eye on you, Isaiah. Watch yourself. Also quiet, sensitive, cute. Bailey feels she needs to protect Christina from insult and injury. Christina diaries that she doesn't need no stinkin' protection.
Tierney: 17 (Captain of the drill team) You don't need me to tell you that Tierney is very pretty. Ether says she's “B-e-a-yootiful” and TJ is completely smitten with her: his cartoon character heart is beating out of his chest. And that's all anyone had to say about Tierney! Girl can sing, though. See, in the first ep, a faculty member came to see another boy from her high school perform. They took him, but the faculty guy also was really impressed by Tierney, too, and invited her to the semi-finals in Orlando. Sweet! We didn't see any more of the boy they initially came to see, by the way. That's the breaks, kid!
TJ: 17 (Considers his mother his friend and mentor) Aw. First impression from Tierney: he is definitely “her type.” TJ is so happy, he explodes into candy. Other impressions: intimidating, basketballer, mamma's boy. Not really meant as an insult, but TJ looks a little insulted and diaries about being raised by his mother in South Central. And I am admitting right here that I got misty when he was told he made it to the finals. His mom was so happy he moved on that she almost passed out, but Nick Lachey told her there's no passing out allowed. Aw.
Bailey: 16 (Has a 4.4 GPA) Bailey is a perky blond. You should hate her. I did in high school, but now? Not so much. I could turn on her at any moment though. She diaries that she's not the most popular girl in school. Impressions: confident, popular -- “every girl hates on in the school.” Who said that, you ask? Why, it's the ladies' man Isaiah. Bad, Isaiah, and the editors agree with me. Perky music has been replaced by solemn sounds. And then Bailey diaries, quite perkily, that no one talks to her at school. Aw. What else? Standoffish, with her popular pretty friends, while everyone else is off to the side. Bailey says she's not surprised by these impressions, and then diaries that she's never had close friends. She then goes on to say that not having friends has helped her get ahead with what she wants because she has nothing tying her down or holding her back. She sounds so damn perky here, I'm confused as to how I feel: sad or impressed. My hate meter is still low on her for now.
Anthony: 17 (MCs his high school assemblies) Anthony is pretty much smiling all. The. Time. I think he has such a cute face. Impressions: smiley, a little teddy bear (A *little* teddy bear? he asks), puts a smile on your face. Tierney sees right through the smiling clown face and says she thought of him as having low self esteem, and that he would be constantly complaining about his weight and unhappiness and how it would make the rest of them uncomfortable. Tierney, sweetie, it's not about you. But Anthony diaries that it was like she knew him before coming to this competition, because he was more withdrawn before but made a choice to change and become a fun and funny guy in high school.
Shayna: 17 (Taught herself guitar) Shayna's parents built her a studio in their basement. Yeah, she's that kid. The faculty guy actually went to her house and she did some jamming there, and it was good. Very low key, coffee-house type vibe from her. Impressions: nature girl, “gorgeous” (Ether), hippie girl, laid back, uniquely hot -- from Stan. Stan wants to chill with her, though. Just chill, but Shayna's reaction makes me think she's figuring out how to turn that friend into an friend with benny's ASAP. Or maybe that's just what I'd be doing.
And that's our 12! Rob asks the difference between seeing and being seen. James says that just looking at someone isn't reliable, since he thought Stan was going to kill him. Stan says “I like you, man” and it really makes me get a Top Gun, You-can-be-my-wingman-anytime vibe, which aww. And not so much squick, 'cause they are just kids. Rob says he wanted to give them some flowery speech about “letting your light shine” but he thinks they have that down already. Nick shows up with the rest of the faculty bearing gifts -- from K-Mart! Good product placement, and I never thought I'd hear Nick Lachey say those words ever. Cool gifts ensue and Christie reacts to her DVD player with “Shut. Up.” How could this get any better? Well, we're going to visit the High School Musical 3 movie set! Pandemonium breaks out. Bailey can't wait, and Anthony is “uber-excited.”
East High School is no Rydel, let's just say. I like my schools, well, old school. And I don't mean Sandy-Danny Rydel. I'm talking Stefanie-Cool Rider/Michael. Yeah, same school, I guess, just different. And better. Oh yes, I said it. Back to East High, which excites the kids, but me, not so much, seeing as how I'm old and haven't even seen HSM. But I can empathize with the excitement, and know I would be equally flipping out to, say, be in the bio lab where “Reproduction” played out. Looking at this modern East High, I wondered: is this a real school? Or some elaborate set? Then I remember, it's summer so it's not like there'd be real kids there. And this school is in Salt Lake City, Utah, which isn't really a hotbed of Hollywood film making, and then I almost giggle, 'cuz when I use initials for Salt Lake (SLC, UT) it almost spells “slut.” See? I decide I can't work it all out right now, so let's assume it's a real school.
Anyway, as they're standing in the EHS cafeteria, the kids flip the eff out. Gabrielle was here! And Sharpay walked right over there! Since I haven't seen the movie, I wonder how to spell “Sharpay”. I am convinced it's “Sharpe”, like with an accent mark, but alas, no. Bailey has to take a moment when Nick points out that she's standing right where Zac Efron stood. Nick calls in Kenny Ortega, the movies' director and choreographer. You don't see many people wearing those two hats often. On a movie set, I mean. Kenny talks about what impresses him most in auditions, that being confidence, a performer owning himself. Briana asks for Kenny's advice for them. Kenny thinks they should watch lots of old movies, and Briana's like “Kewl, like Rent?” He says they should get a range of experience by watching Mickie and Judy -- and the kids are all “Who?” -- and the Busby Berkley movies, and I'm all “Who?” Nick then brings in the actors who play Ryan, Kelsi and Martha and opens up questions from the kids. How did you get started in theater? “Ryan” got into the stage in high school, then after graduation, went to LA. “Martha” says that she was teaching dance in SLC, UT (hee!) and brought her students to audition. She goes on to say that she met Kenny there and he put her in a part they had. Kenny corrects her by saying they wrote a part specifically for her. This whole exchange is odd, these two are holding hands, and smiling at each other. Which I'm sure is just a mentor, um, mentee kinda thing, unless it's an old guy with his ingenue thing. In which case, eew. But cool story otherwise, Martha! Right place, right time. “Kelsi” apparently just wandered into this shot from the street, as she has no discovery story. Aw. They each go on about the HSM family, yadda, and Briana is inspired. The three actors leave.
Kenny calls for a “jam”, and he'll pick out one at a time people to take a solo. Nick then ominously voice overs that what the kids don't know is that Kenny is judging the finale! And he'll decide who will be the winner! Gasp! They sing a song together that I've never heard, I assume from HSM. Bailey is chosen to sing alone first, and she diaries that it was exciting, but you just know that she's so the type of girl that takes this as sign from the heavens that she is going to win this. When Briana goes up, she forgets her lines. Again. During the eliminations of the semi-finals, she flubbed all kinds of lines. She voice-overs some excuses. Get it together Bri -- this is Kenny ORTEGA, for God's sake! The kids all do great and really let loose. But I can see that Happy Anthony and Stan are probably going to be the first to go. Aw. Ether let's loose that voice that surprises you. Go, Ether! Kenny is really enjoying himself. In a borderline creepy way. He's definitely that drama teacher from high school that was really, really into it. Kenny then badly acts that he has to run, but he doesn't want to leave them. Aw. I'd be all “Kenny, take us with you, dammit!” But these kids are too polite, so Kenny has to ask them if they want to come with him -- and be in the movie! Do we want to be in the movie? Is a grown man calling himself “Kenny” creepy? Hell's yeah!!
They all pile over to the set and get suited up. In the dressing room, Anthony is rolling up his sleeves and says in his near-Boston accent that he wants to look “semi-musculah.” James gets a chuckle out of that, and **sigh**, James. Yeah, I have to stop this illegal crush on that boy before I find myself locked in a cell with 6 female teachers who couldn't discern reality from -- eew. Now for makeup, which is funny, since they're just going to be extras, but whatever. And Anthony says he's glad the makeup doesn't make him look like he's wearing makeup, because he wants to keep his masculinity. Then laughs at himself. Aw. Hearts, Anthony. Kenny teaches them how to cheer, cameras roll and a basketball game breaks out. The kids have an amazing day, 'cuz, duh.
Another faculty member, Regina Williams, a dance instructor, comes in to do dance exercises. Regina has an ulterior motive, though, because she these exercises will really bring out the performers. Briana is excited to learn the “ancient styles” of dance. Regina says she'll work on abs next, and Anthony says his abs are “rahk hahd” and he's good. By this time, it looks like a really hard workout, here! I'd be dead at this point, as just watching this has me sucking down a Marlboro. Next is a routine with a basketball. Amazingly, everyone has made it! I'm winded, myself. Regina gives a pep talk during the cool down about being a team player, and that you make mistakes and learn from them and give 110%. Aw. Regina knows they've been inspired by her talk. I know I am. Where's my lighter?
Final thoughts from the kids. Isaiah is “so ready for this opportunity”, and is amazed he's here doing this. Anthony says there's only supposed to be one winner, but he already feels like a winner because he's met so many new friends. Nick slaps them all in the face with a dose of reality and says have fun now, because tomorrow, it “all begins.” James says anything could happen. Shayna says that everything she's worked for could come true. The kids then all get together in the EHS cafeteria and jam to Elton John's “Tiny Dancer” with Shayna on the piano. This has been all rehearsed, I'm sure, since everyone takes their turn and no one sings all over anyone else. By no one of course I mean Bailey. James diaries that he can't believe he's not in a dream. Isaiah makes love to the girls with his singing and eyes. Bailey diaries that she wants this more than anyone here. Everyone harmonizes and dances together, and it looks so lovely. For now. I haven't been round the teenagers in a while, so I don't know if the claws come out right away tomorrow, or if we have to wait for that or...? And don't think that just because I'm not recapping it that I won't be watching Monday's ep.
Wow! That was so much fun, and way more HSM-anything than one person should watch in one sitting. Thanks for reading!
So, I must first admit that when I got this assignment, I downloaded the entire season to check out what I was getting into. It was only 4 eps, so no biggie. I mention this just because I at times may get a little more into the contestants and show than any rational 30-something-sans-kids should. Let's do this!
Nick Lachey tells us that what happened previously, which I totally already know about. But this isn't about me. Kids were auditioned from around the country by 6 talent scouts (the “faculty”) to find that one kid that is the “total package.” This will be mentioned a lot -- the total package. In case you don't know what that means, the person they choose must have the right combination of “personality, team spirit and talent”. In the coming weeks they will be singing, dancing and acting -- the whole ball of wax. Why are we doing all this, you ask? Well, the grand prize winner gets a talent holding deal, a single released on Disney records, and a starring role in a video to be played at the end of High School Musical 3. So, I had no idea what a talent holding deal was, and I hadda look it up. Basically, they are signed to star in a future show or develop a show at some point in the future. I'm not sure if that's good news or news that means the winner will fade away while Disney waits out this contract. Nick also tells us that there will be “evaluations” and those that don't cut it go to the “chorus.” Aw. I like how they say evaluation, instead of elimination. But now does that mean they still hang around? For what? And where are these kids staying? Are their parents around? More importantly, who's keeping their eye on Isaiah? I just don't know right now.
Anyway, the kids are totally psyched! Before we start smashing dreams, though, Nick insists that we find out why these kids have made the cut. TJ says he hopes the other students' see him as dependable. Aw.
Nick calls in the “faculty”, the 6 experts who are going to be their teachers during the competition, and natch, I haven't heard of them. But I don't run in sing/dance circles, so this is no surprise. Rob Adler, an acting coach, joins the kids on stage and asks them to come up one at a time. The other kids there are then asked to give their first impressions of each kid. Get it? Okay.
James: 16 (Writes in his journal every day) James looks, well, nerdy today, mostly due to his glasses and always-flushed face. James was culled from an audition tape sent into the producers by his father. James is in a band. James would have been my secret crush in HS, actually. I think he'll be adorable when he's older, and he actually has a great voice. First impressions: Briana says “Ummm...” and giggles. Ookay. Though I guess it's probably nerve wracking to be the first. James also gets stylish, smart, chill, intelligent, pretty eyes, calm, collected. I think most of this is code speak for “nerd.” Aw. To be fair, in the shots of James singing with his band, he looks good. But then he must get nervous, because his face is forever flush red, and he's wearing glasses. He's surprised by the calm and collected comment, as he doesn't think he really is. He tries to “put on a front.” James promises us that he will knock our socks off.
Rob babbles on something about not being now who you were a minute ago, and it's “feedback” and information. I don't know either. I think he's just trying to break the ice. I guess it works, because James agrees with him.
Briana: 16 (Homeshooled all her life) She reminds me of Mandy Moore a bit. First impressions: Shy, sporty, rocker, intimidating, gives a power punch. I swear someone also said “player” but I must have misheard. She does seem well adjusted for being home schooled.
Stan: 17 (Former HS footballer) Impressions: popular, jock, always has a girl, ladies' man. Anthony says he would have given him his lunch money to avoid getting beaten up. Shayna says she feels like he wants a secret girlfriend that no one knows about. Stan blushes.
Christie: 18 (Has 210 friends in her phone) No, really. That's what the little blurb says. This is actually not terribly surprising, once you watch her for 5 seconds. She is not shy. I've never even met 210 people in my whole life, I don't think. Anyway, impressions: Colorful, sweet girl, bubbly -- dumb blond (from Isaiah). Record scratch as we see Christie not just frown, but look totally pissed and hurt. Rob asks if that surprises her, and she says no, but what did surprise her was that he said it -- had the balls to say it, I gather. She laughs it off though -- girlfriend has way more control than me.
Isaiah voice overs that he thinks the others were just too nervous to be truthful to someone who would then judge you.
Isaiah: 17 (Nominated for Prom King) He's the one that said Christie seemed like a dumb blond. He's also a self-claimed ladies' man, though in previous shows (did I mention I watched them all?) some of the girls say it about him as well. Though whether his actions or just him talking about it all the time prompted them to say that, we'll never know. Impressions: player, ego, flirt, sporto. Isaiah diaries that he has lots of friends, that just happen to be girls. I've heard that one before. Christie says that he seems an over achiever in sports since he's so short. Zing!
Ether: 18 (Plays 12 instruments) He carries a heavy nerd vibe, this one. And while he can sing, he has a hard time shrugging this image. Impressions: painfully shy, nerd, quiet, nerd, timid, bookworm, nerd, nerd, nerd. Well, not actually, but you get the idea. He swears he doesn't know why people think he's a nerd. Then he warns someone off camera to give him back his pen. But really, if it looks like a duck, and walks like a duck... Embrace the nerd, Ether. Then knock 'em dead with your singing.
Christina: 18 (Tomboy in high school) Impressions: exotic beauty, very attractive, someone “I want to get to know” -- that from Isaiah. I've got my eye on you, Isaiah. Watch yourself. Also quiet, sensitive, cute. Bailey feels she needs to protect Christina from insult and injury. Christina diaries that she doesn't need no stinkin' protection.
Tierney: 17 (Captain of the drill team) You don't need me to tell you that Tierney is very pretty. Ether says she's “B-e-a-yootiful” and TJ is completely smitten with her: his cartoon character heart is beating out of his chest. And that's all anyone had to say about Tierney! Girl can sing, though. See, in the first ep, a faculty member came to see another boy from her high school perform. They took him, but the faculty guy also was really impressed by Tierney, too, and invited her to the semi-finals in Orlando. Sweet! We didn't see any more of the boy they initially came to see, by the way. That's the breaks, kid!
TJ: 17 (Considers his mother his friend and mentor) Aw. First impression from Tierney: he is definitely “her type.” TJ is so happy, he explodes into candy. Other impressions: intimidating, basketballer, mamma's boy. Not really meant as an insult, but TJ looks a little insulted and diaries about being raised by his mother in South Central. And I am admitting right here that I got misty when he was told he made it to the finals. His mom was so happy he moved on that she almost passed out, but Nick Lachey told her there's no passing out allowed. Aw.
Bailey: 16 (Has a 4.4 GPA) Bailey is a perky blond. You should hate her. I did in high school, but now? Not so much. I could turn on her at any moment though. She diaries that she's not the most popular girl in school. Impressions: confident, popular -- “every girl hates on in the school.” Who said that, you ask? Why, it's the ladies' man Isaiah. Bad, Isaiah, and the editors agree with me. Perky music has been replaced by solemn sounds. And then Bailey diaries, quite perkily, that no one talks to her at school. Aw. What else? Standoffish, with her popular pretty friends, while everyone else is off to the side. Bailey says she's not surprised by these impressions, and then diaries that she's never had close friends. She then goes on to say that not having friends has helped her get ahead with what she wants because she has nothing tying her down or holding her back. She sounds so damn perky here, I'm confused as to how I feel: sad or impressed. My hate meter is still low on her for now.
Anthony: 17 (MCs his high school assemblies) Anthony is pretty much smiling all. The. Time. I think he has such a cute face. Impressions: smiley, a little teddy bear (A *little* teddy bear? he asks), puts a smile on your face. Tierney sees right through the smiling clown face and says she thought of him as having low self esteem, and that he would be constantly complaining about his weight and unhappiness and how it would make the rest of them uncomfortable. Tierney, sweetie, it's not about you. But Anthony diaries that it was like she knew him before coming to this competition, because he was more withdrawn before but made a choice to change and become a fun and funny guy in high school.
Shayna: 17 (Taught herself guitar) Shayna's parents built her a studio in their basement. Yeah, she's that kid. The faculty guy actually went to her house and she did some jamming there, and it was good. Very low key, coffee-house type vibe from her. Impressions: nature girl, “gorgeous” (Ether), hippie girl, laid back, uniquely hot -- from Stan. Stan wants to chill with her, though. Just chill, but Shayna's reaction makes me think she's figuring out how to turn that friend into an friend with benny's ASAP. Or maybe that's just what I'd be doing.
And that's our 12! Rob asks the difference between seeing and being seen. James says that just looking at someone isn't reliable, since he thought Stan was going to kill him. Stan says “I like you, man” and it really makes me get a Top Gun, You-can-be-my-wingman-anytime vibe, which aww. And not so much squick, 'cause they are just kids. Rob says he wanted to give them some flowery speech about “letting your light shine” but he thinks they have that down already. Nick shows up with the rest of the faculty bearing gifts -- from K-Mart! Good product placement, and I never thought I'd hear Nick Lachey say those words ever. Cool gifts ensue and Christie reacts to her DVD player with “Shut. Up.” How could this get any better? Well, we're going to visit the High School Musical 3 movie set! Pandemonium breaks out. Bailey can't wait, and Anthony is “uber-excited.”
East High School is no Rydel, let's just say. I like my schools, well, old school. And I don't mean Sandy-Danny Rydel. I'm talking Stefanie-Cool Rider/Michael. Yeah, same school, I guess, just different. And better. Oh yes, I said it. Back to East High, which excites the kids, but me, not so much, seeing as how I'm old and haven't even seen HSM. But I can empathize with the excitement, and know I would be equally flipping out to, say, be in the bio lab where “Reproduction” played out. Looking at this modern East High, I wondered: is this a real school? Or some elaborate set? Then I remember, it's summer so it's not like there'd be real kids there. And this school is in Salt Lake City, Utah, which isn't really a hotbed of Hollywood film making, and then I almost giggle, 'cuz when I use initials for Salt Lake (SLC, UT) it almost spells “slut.” See? I decide I can't work it all out right now, so let's assume it's a real school.
Anyway, as they're standing in the EHS cafeteria, the kids flip the eff out. Gabrielle was here! And Sharpay walked right over there! Since I haven't seen the movie, I wonder how to spell “Sharpay”. I am convinced it's “Sharpe”, like with an accent mark, but alas, no. Bailey has to take a moment when Nick points out that she's standing right where Zac Efron stood. Nick calls in Kenny Ortega, the movies' director and choreographer. You don't see many people wearing those two hats often. On a movie set, I mean. Kenny talks about what impresses him most in auditions, that being confidence, a performer owning himself. Briana asks for Kenny's advice for them. Kenny thinks they should watch lots of old movies, and Briana's like “Kewl, like Rent?” He says they should get a range of experience by watching Mickie and Judy -- and the kids are all “Who?” -- and the Busby Berkley movies, and I'm all “Who?” Nick then brings in the actors who play Ryan, Kelsi and Martha and opens up questions from the kids. How did you get started in theater? “Ryan” got into the stage in high school, then after graduation, went to LA. “Martha” says that she was teaching dance in SLC, UT (hee!) and brought her students to audition. She goes on to say that she met Kenny there and he put her in a part they had. Kenny corrects her by saying they wrote a part specifically for her. This whole exchange is odd, these two are holding hands, and smiling at each other. Which I'm sure is just a mentor, um, mentee kinda thing, unless it's an old guy with his ingenue thing. In which case, eew. But cool story otherwise, Martha! Right place, right time. “Kelsi” apparently just wandered into this shot from the street, as she has no discovery story. Aw. They each go on about the HSM family, yadda, and Briana is inspired. The three actors leave.
Kenny calls for a “jam”, and he'll pick out one at a time people to take a solo. Nick then ominously voice overs that what the kids don't know is that Kenny is judging the finale! And he'll decide who will be the winner! Gasp! They sing a song together that I've never heard, I assume from HSM. Bailey is chosen to sing alone first, and she diaries that it was exciting, but you just know that she's so the type of girl that takes this as sign from the heavens that she is going to win this. When Briana goes up, she forgets her lines. Again. During the eliminations of the semi-finals, she flubbed all kinds of lines. She voice-overs some excuses. Get it together Bri -- this is Kenny ORTEGA, for God's sake! The kids all do great and really let loose. But I can see that Happy Anthony and Stan are probably going to be the first to go. Aw. Ether let's loose that voice that surprises you. Go, Ether! Kenny is really enjoying himself. In a borderline creepy way. He's definitely that drama teacher from high school that was really, really into it. Kenny then badly acts that he has to run, but he doesn't want to leave them. Aw. I'd be all “Kenny, take us with you, dammit!” But these kids are too polite, so Kenny has to ask them if they want to come with him -- and be in the movie! Do we want to be in the movie? Is a grown man calling himself “Kenny” creepy? Hell's yeah!!
They all pile over to the set and get suited up. In the dressing room, Anthony is rolling up his sleeves and says in his near-Boston accent that he wants to look “semi-musculah.” James gets a chuckle out of that, and **sigh**, James. Yeah, I have to stop this illegal crush on that boy before I find myself locked in a cell with 6 female teachers who couldn't discern reality from -- eew. Now for makeup, which is funny, since they're just going to be extras, but whatever. And Anthony says he's glad the makeup doesn't make him look like he's wearing makeup, because he wants to keep his masculinity. Then laughs at himself. Aw. Hearts, Anthony. Kenny teaches them how to cheer, cameras roll and a basketball game breaks out. The kids have an amazing day, 'cuz, duh.
Another faculty member, Regina Williams, a dance instructor, comes in to do dance exercises. Regina has an ulterior motive, though, because she these exercises will really bring out the performers. Briana is excited to learn the “ancient styles” of dance. Regina says she'll work on abs next, and Anthony says his abs are “rahk hahd” and he's good. By this time, it looks like a really hard workout, here! I'd be dead at this point, as just watching this has me sucking down a Marlboro. Next is a routine with a basketball. Amazingly, everyone has made it! I'm winded, myself. Regina gives a pep talk during the cool down about being a team player, and that you make mistakes and learn from them and give 110%. Aw. Regina knows they've been inspired by her talk. I know I am. Where's my lighter?
Final thoughts from the kids. Isaiah is “so ready for this opportunity”, and is amazed he's here doing this. Anthony says there's only supposed to be one winner, but he already feels like a winner because he's met so many new friends. Nick slaps them all in the face with a dose of reality and says have fun now, because tomorrow, it “all begins.” James says anything could happen. Shayna says that everything she's worked for could come true. The kids then all get together in the EHS cafeteria and jam to Elton John's “Tiny Dancer” with Shayna on the piano. This has been all rehearsed, I'm sure, since everyone takes their turn and no one sings all over anyone else. By no one of course I mean Bailey. James diaries that he can't believe he's not in a dream. Isaiah makes love to the girls with his singing and eyes. Bailey diaries that she wants this more than anyone here. Everyone harmonizes and dances together, and it looks so lovely. For now. I haven't been round the teenagers in a while, so I don't know if the claws come out right away tomorrow, or if we have to wait for that or...? And don't think that just because I'm not recapping it that I won't be watching Monday's ep.
Wow! That was so much fun, and way more HSM-anything than one person should watch in one sitting. Thanks for reading!